Is there any ideal more vaunted in the blogosphere than this notion of The Conversation? Creating one, participating in one, shaping one… Gah! Stop! My malarkey meter is buzzing. Is “conversation” even useful?

Conversation is definitely happening on blogs. If I think about the many blogs I read regularly, most of them feature conversation, but not discussion. Don’t think there’s a difference? Let’s bring in old Noah Webster:

con⋅ver⋅sa⋅tion

-noun; the informal interchange of thoughts, information, etc., by spoken words; oral communication between persons; talk; colloquy. The ability to talk socially with others.

dis⋅cus⋅sion

-noun; an act or instance of discussing; consideration or examination by argument, comment, etc., esp. to explore solutions; informal debate.

Semantics, maybe, but what’s present in the definition of discussion that’s lacking in that of conversation is the element of argument and debate.

Most of the blog comments I read are along the lines of “great post!” or “LOVE your thoughts here, so true!” It’s more rampant with the big-name bloggers some readers are trying to cozy up to. David Spinks’ post from last month hit on the idea of people being overly complimentary just to conform to a community.

Few social media or marketing blogs I read seem to really be able to drum up discussion — actual debate in search of solutions — and not just conversation. (Beth Harte’s blog is pretty good at it.) I’m not sure if it’s because the blog authors themselves are too “safe” with topics and don’t offer posts that inspire debate, or if the commenters are afraid of offending the blogger or other commenters. To our credit, most of us “social media types” comment with a real name and URL attached, which makes us more accountable for our thoughts and words. But does it matter if you stand by what you say if you’re really not saying anything?

Before you go all “she who casts the first stone” on me, I’ll readily admit that I am not often one to dig in with debate or discussion on a blog post. If I disagree with a post, I’m just as likely to not comment at all versus commenting critically. I’ve never been an argumentative person or a debater. Some of it is not wanting to “offend” the blogger or community. Some of it is self-doubt as to whether my opposing view is “right” or not. I’m relatively new to this portion of the interwebs and I don’t always feel like I’ve gained the knowledge or credibility to be able to articulate my position and criticize the ideas of people who’ve been doing this for much longer than I have. I need to do better at articulating and sharing my opinions, even if they’re different. I need to discuss, not just converse.

People want to be liked. An easy way to achieve this is to never say anything contrarian. But that’s also not how people come to understand different points of view and create solutions together. I’d even argue that most bloggers would prefer comments that challenge their views and make them think differently than a chorus of “me, too!” voices. Brain wrinkles are good, folks.

So let’s all shoot for a little less conversation and a little more discussion, eh?